MY BIRTHDAY!!!

My Birthday...
This si the day when i recall back..
When my mother struggled to bring me....
To this world....
I've once promised to ALLAH..
As i hold my hand tightly in the womb...
That i'll complete my task and responsibilities...
As ALLAH's caliph to the world...

How far have i done my tasks...
How long have i wasted my life...
How bad i am in front of you..ALLAH..
The tears that ran down my cheeks...
Is it really true?...
Is it really the last one...?
Or its one of the false tears that ran down and been forgotten..
As i turn back against you.......again..

OH... ALLAH...
No matter how rude i am to you...
No matter how unfaithful i am to you...
No matter how unthankful i am to you.....
You have never leave me alone...
even an oxygen have never been taken away...
And all the days that i am able to open my eyes...
you really are.....
THE MOST MERCIFUL..

And still.....
I've been more attracted to other's love...
Then yours....
tears rolled down again....
Oh ALLAH...
i realise...
that not just once......
that you reminded me....
even a lovers would quit from trying...
but you... have never stop....
The judgement day is not just a dream...
its something that...so near to me...
but it seems so far that.....lots and lots..
of people...in the end..suffering..

and now...
after a long while i've been playing...
in this temporary world...
i started to miss....your blessings...your love...
in my life.....
eventhogh i realise....
that this humble slave....
a slave that always betray her words...

Please.. ALLAH
Please make this 'taubat' the real one...
to you....
oh ALLAH, forgive all my sins...
Oh ALLAH, please.. shine my life..
with your blessings..
perhaps all the 'hijab' that've been...
blocking my heart from you...
would dissappear.......

please...please...
HAPPY bIRTHDAY..
nur farahin binti mat tarmizi...